Friday, July 16, 2010

my first time

my heart was beating wildly. "i am not ready... i am not ready..." were the words marquee-ing in and out of my head. but there was no other time. this would have to be it. it would have to be now.

i've only just met her. incognizant that we would ever come to this point, i never really took the time to really get to know her.

then there i was, seated with my stomach in knots, painfully awake despite last night's sleepless duty, patiently waiting for her. then she arrived, laid in bed. all the hairs in my body went up, seemingly electrocuted by this meeting. although not the first, it felt like it was.

she laid there, neck hyperextended, waiting for me. i went onto the bed beside her, hesitant on what to do next. i felt clumsy and idiotic. i ran my fingers through her neck, i think rather frequent than was supposed. then, mustering all the courage i have, i opened her up. as gentle as i could, i opened her up. with my bumbling fingers, i made my way in. tenderly i split with my instrument the flesh that came my way. finally i saw the pink membrane i was looking for, the membrane separating me from her. i parted it, then drove my thing inside. a huge burst of energy crashed on to me. I AM INSIDE. we then both took a lung-full of breath.

and that is the story of my first tracheostomy.

2 comments:

Marlo said...

Ginawa mong interesting ang isang bagay na masusuka ako pag nasaksihan ko. Hehe.

Nice doc! Galing!

-MARGE- said...

haha. may napapadpad pa pala dito. hehe. thanks, marlo :)